A Man Took Her to Church and Took My Woman but God Had His Own Plan

In 2023, I moved to Accra for a new job. They gave us a shared house, and one of my housemates had a younger sister. She was a student nurse, …

Relationship Nov 20, 2025 0 11 Add to Reading List

A Man Took Her to Church and Took My Woman but God Had His Own Plan

In 2023, I moved to Accra for a new job. They gave us a shared house, and one of my housemates had a younger sister. She was a student nurse, sweet and quiet. Whenever she visited, we would just say “hi” and “how are you?” That was it. I never thought much of it.

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Then one day, my phone rang. It was her. She had taken my number from her brother’s phone. She was on her way back to school and just decided to call. I could hear in her voice that she liked me. And honestly, I was lonely. So we started talking, and just like that, we were dating.

Two weeks in, she told me she was a virgin. A “pure farm,” as we say. My own heart had been broken before, so I was scared. I opened up to her. I told her I was afraid to love her unless I was sure she loved me too. She understood. And when we finally took that step, it felt like I had given her every part of me, my body, my mind, and my soul. After that, I was all in

I wanted to take care of her. If she needed money for school, I sent it. If she needed something for herself, I made sure she had it, even before she asked. I loved providing for her. It made me feel like I was building something with her.

But her brother was not having it. He was ready to fight her over me. And she was ready to fight him right back. It was her mother who finally calmed things down and gave us her blessing. Meeting her family was a big step. They welcomed me with just one firm warning. They said, “Do not get her pregnant before marriage.” My family loved her too. It felt like we were building something real, you know. Something special.

For two years, we did the long-distance thing. I was in Accra, and she was in Kumasi. It was hard, but we made it work. She only visited when she was traveling back to school, which I understood. I missed her, but I believed in us.

Then, my health started to fail. I would get tired just walking a short distance. When the doctors told me my kidneys were failing, my whole world shrank. I was sick and scared, and it changed me. I was not the man I used to be, and I told her everything. There were nights I lay in bed, truly believing I might not see the morning.

So when the doctor sat me down early this year and told me my kidneys had recovered, I felt a relief I cannot describe. The first person I called was her. Not my mom, not my brother. Her. She was my first thought.

One evening, she sent me screenshots of a chat with her friend’s boss. He invited her to church, then asked for her pictures. Instead of shutting him down, she promised to ‘flood his phone’ with more. I was so angry. I asked her what was wrong with her and why she was so desperate for attention. I know that hurt her, and I regret how I said it, but it was like my heart was breaking in real time.

Instead of stopping, she just got better at hiding it. Her own brother called me to warn me she was still talking to the man. He was now on my side, begging her to be faithful, but she would not listen.

This man started picking her up for “church” early in the morning and bringing her back late at night. That was their routine.

With her brother’s help, we talked to her friend. And the friend told us everything. She said my girlfriend had let this man kiss her and that she had kissed him back. The friend was just as confused as I was. She said the man was a known flirt who had even hit on her first.

But what hurt most was what happened next. As soon as her friend left, my girlfriend ran to call this man and told him everything. Her friend was so betrayed she quit her job and left that church for good.

I was done. I told myself it was over. But how do you just turn off your heart. How do you unfavorite the person who was your whole world.

I could not. So I took her back, clinging to the hope that maybe it was just a kiss. We involved her mother again, and things seemed calm on the surface. But deep down, something between us had broken. Our conversations felt stiff. Our connection was like a weak phone signal, cutting in and out.

I begged her to come to Accra so we could try to fix things. Her mother agreed. But suddenly, there was always an excuse. “My period is in,” she would say. Or, “My eyes hurt, I cannot see well enough to travel.” Every day, a new reason not to come.

So I went to Kumasi myself. I needed to see her and to look into her eyes and know the truth. When she arrived, I took her phone. I know it sounds controlling, but my trust was so shattered I felt I had no other choice.

I checked her call log and found nothing. I checked her WhatsApp chats and they were all cleared. But then I opened her WhatsApp call history, and my heart just dropped. There they were. Multiple video calls with that same man. The last one was from less than a week ago.

In that moment, I felt my soul leave my body.

I asked her, “What is it about this man that you cannot let go.”

She said, “You would not understand.”

When I pushed, she told me, “Sometimes when I read the Bible and do not understand, he explains it to me. He is a pastor’s son.”

That night, when I tried to hold her, she told me she was “born again” now and that we could only be intimate after marriage.

The next morning, I took her to the bus stop. She promised she would come to see me at my place by 4:30, after church. I waited and waited. She never came.

Instead, her sister called me around 7 p.m., asking if she was with me. Then her brother called. She had told them she was coming to see me, but she never did.

That is when I knew. It was over.

I went back to Accra the next day, my heart in pieces. She never even called to see if I got home safe.

Her family held a meeting. They were afraid I might try to hurt her. They offered to pay me back for all I had spent on her.

But I told them no. Everything I did, I did out of love. The only thing I asked for was the 5,000 GHS I had recently invested in her business. I had told her from the start that it was an investment and not a gift because I was already feeling us slip away. The truth is, I had already spent nearly 9,000 GHS setting her up. That 5,000 meant nothing if we were together. But after everything, I could not let my money go into a lie.

Of course, she kept postponing paying me back. She set the dates herself and broke every single one.

One night, feeling completely broken, I joined a relationship coach’s live session on TikTok. I shared my story because I was at my lowest. I honestly thought about walking into her church and causing a scene.

But the people there saved me. They told me to let it go. To take the lesson and not the pain.

So I decided to call her brother and tell him I was letting the debt go. But before I could, a notification popped up on my phone.

She had sent 2,000 GHS with the message, “I am sorry.”

I still called her brother. I told him I was done chasing the rest. If she pays, fine. If not, I am letting it be.

I also told him the truth. I did not fall for her because she was beautiful. I fell for her because she trusted me with her first time. Because she fought her own family for me when I was ready to walk away.

I had planned a whole future with her. My dream was to live abroad, and I wanted her by my side. It did not matter how we got there, as long as we were together.

All of this heartbreak happened between January and April.

But God’s timing is not our own.

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In August, my UK visa was approved. Today, I am writing this from a place I once dreamed we would share. It is not perfect, but I am here. And I know now that God had a different plan for me.

I am sharing this for anyone who has ever poured their heart, time, and money into someone, only to be left feeling empty. Please remember that your love is an investment. Your time is an investment. Do not let someone take it for granted.

Accept what happened. Learn from it. People do not really change. They just learn to hide it better.

Stop chasing them. Chase your purpose. If you do not have one, find it. Build your own dream.

And never forget that God always has a plan.