“Don't Beg For Love” — Didi-Omah Augustine Chinazaekpere

I don't like to be talking about love and relationship except I was told to say something on it; or I want to address. One of my Executive recently asked a very important question: He said to me, “Sir, if you remove sex and money in most relationships, the relationships will not stand”.

Hmmm! I reasoned it, like I was thinking deeply about it, looking the sky and listening to my Christian musics; yes. I reflects all my friendship with ladies, I wept, I felt sorry for those that are seeking for man's love in a wrong place. Tears started running from my eyes, I felt sorry for those spending time, attention, and love on the ladies that see them as a second option. I was a second option, but I had never been in a relationship.

Many tried and many failed. Executive, but I have never begged for love. Since my unique, Ishola Rukayat Nifemi Arike died in March 2026 after battling with a deadly illness, since Kingdom Enoch died in my SS1 in a car accident that breaks his brain. Since my favourite cousin, Samuel, died during my national diploma year over a clash in Egbeda, Emohua Local Government, Rivers State. I am not afraid to lose anything or anyone; because I don't tie my happiness to anyone or anything except the Word of God.

Whoever feeds you control you. Spiritual life hits harder than physical life, that's why I keep building my spiritual life with God. Tomorrow is not promised, what will be will be; stop fighting for what is beyond your control. Love is real, love will prevail. There is nothing like fake love, it is love or affection. Most people have affection and thoughts is love. I have studied love, lust, affection, feeling, hatred, death, wisdom and foolishness. By God's grace, I can know when someone is truly loving you or just having affection for you — through the truth and facts presented. 

Many people have lust for you because of your money, appearance, achievements, their gains — and since they cannot control themselves; they will say it is love. Love cannot be tied to something present, if it is, that's not love. Love does not control, love is not lying to keep your partner, love is not loud but pure, love is not fear.

The scripture said “Perfected love chases away fear”. For God have not given us the spirit of fear but of love, power and sound mind. So why should I be afraid, when I know I am spreading true love and true knowledge without compromise. Being everywhere gets you nowhere. Life is meaningless without God, at the end it is only God that keeps His promises. Some people are using you as second choice, when their true lover gives them attention, they backed you. 

When the lover start turns aside, they reconnect to you — step down because those in this circle are confused about what they want. I smiled, I read(red) many on relationship, courtship and marriage — articles, books, and more from the Bible. Executive, in 2022, my DMs on facebook was full with relationship issues, by the wisdom of God and thorough knowledge on romantic relationship and family building; I gave life applicable knowledge both those in Africa and outside Africa. Mostly from Ghana, I remembered well!

One of the truth I will give to young people at this time on relationships, I mean romantic relationship. Executive, I don't beg for anyone to accept me, I don't need the public validations to know if I am in a good romantic relationship. If I need the public validation in my romantic affairs with my lover, then I am not having a good fun.

If you need to be valued and respected in your relationship, you shouldn't beg anyone to accept you the way you are. You should not beg anyone to love you — don't beg for love. Executive, begging for someone's love bring you to the rag floor. You will not be valued and be of worth in the eyes of the partner! 

I can say this anywhere, nobody loves me more than God. There is no man or woman, even my lover, my parents, my relatives, my siblings — there is no one that loves me more than Adonay. I will never beg anyone to marry me, I will never beg any lady to stay with me, I will never beg any woman to love me as her husband.

This I tell you; if you want to be valued, loved truly, be respected in the relationship, you want to maintain your peace and dignity — Don't beg anyone to love, accept, marry, and be with you — as partner. Learn to love God, your neighbours, and yourself! Executive, even God that wrote and expressed the greatest love story in history of man, does not force us to love Him. He said, "IF", Adonay did not say or force us to "MUST". So who made me god over you, that I will manipulate you to love me, never!

I am not wicked nor I am blind that I will step on your toes. For even when we were yet sinners, God express His love for us, that Christ died for our sins. There is no one that can die for you, even your mother, your partner, your lover. For God so love you, that He gave Jesus Christ as a ransom for your sins — love posses giving. If the confession of love does not have giving from both sides, then that's not love. I will marry right, I have confidence about that! Giving is part of love, that's why it is called "Charity".

The Holy Scriptures urges us not to love only in word but of good deeds. Love is kind, love is selfless, love is strong as death, love separates not because when death comes that how love is. Death is monad same is love. Love is deeper than human understanding, no wonder the Bible said God is love. If you don't understand God you cannot understand perfect love. I said: Storm-free Marriage; people are talking about marriages with problems, relationship with issues, courtship with faults.

I want storm-free relationship, and it is possible, it is my faith. I keep building my faith everyday and my knowledge bank in my head. Storm-free Marriage is possible, Executive, what do you mean? You are asking, because then we used to talk about how to solve problems and I hate problems. I can’t go and sign up for a problem when I know it is a problem, I have been praying for a storm-free marriage from God since my Junior Secondary Education at Zion International High School; and He showed me it to me, He said to me, "A strong solid lasting relationship and marriage is built on the foundation of Love, Respect and Friendship”. My God, I received it, I believed it, I was too bold. Love is not enough, commitment does. 

When you love your partner, especially your wife, as the Bible instructed, even the strongest devil in hell cannot attack your marriage or relationship. You let your love to be weak, you let your faith to weak. I have discovered this: Your choice is stronger than the strongest devil in hell. Your choice to believe the truth will silence every devil everywhere. That's why I valued people's decisions because God's respect the decisions of men. The devil is not the challenge, it is your faith. And you don't have faith problem, you have Word problem.

"Storm-free Marriage”, I never heard that statement from anywhere else in my life. It was my response to what He showed me during my studies on marriage. I will marry right, so I smiled always. When people are saying, "I have a long way to go". I was once like that, until God said to me "Didi-Omah, dump your plan, I have your welfare in my plan, your plan doesn't have your welfare in the future blueprint". So if God said to me, marry now, I will because He sees the future, I might have a good plan for my life, but good does not really mean it is best. The right plan is always the best, God have the right plan and that's the best for our lives.

Executive, I will like to tell you, you are in a courtship, that doesn't necessarily mean the person you are courting with, is the person you will marry, take heed. I have seen many courtships that didn't end in marriage. Most people are the reason they don't experience human's love in their lives: I once saved someone from a fruitless relationship, most of you are confused, you are in a relationship heading nowhere but you are still there because of history. The history you have with the person, the memories are what is keeping you there — remove that, you are like a ghost to the partner. Because your past is good does not mean that your next move won't be better — look before your leap!

Executive, good is the enemy of right. This is good, is it right? — that's the truth. If is it not right, flee from it. I am not afraid of losing anybody or anything; I lost my unique, only those that know me, can tell how closely and dearly, Ishola Rukayat Nifemi Arike was to me to death. I lost Doactalk in December 2023, I wept, only those that know how Doactalk was putting me on the list. Then is it you, it is doacWeb that I can't lose — I will lose you, I will smile without taking action. Life continues, even if I die now, you will still be living, and doacWeb will still be alive. 

Today you don't exist, after some time the partner will show like they cares, and you will fall back — you need some time off! Or you will never enjoy love. I love God, I love everyone and I love myself because that's what the Bible says I should do. My theme till I die is “Redeeming Love"; I believe in love. Executive, if the only relationship you have is love relationship, you are doom for life, because you will marry only one person; you need people to lift you, to connect you, to assist you. Know this, according to Rev. Dr. Bob Joshua, my educational mentor, when I was in JSS 2, he said to us at Zion International High School.

That who you marry determined the rest of your life, forget about your certificate, advanced education, faith, dreams. If you want to be great, marry a person that have you in their future plan not those with the present. Many don't know this. Executive, you can never marry a witch by mistake, you saw her attitude during the friendship into courtship — you turned blind eyes because of the history, beauty, memories, and other distractions. 

Beautiful lady, you cannot marry a cheat by mistake, you saw it, you move ahead. Don't marry people for who they will become, marry them for who they are. For the thought I have for you is of good and not of evil, to give a HOPE and a promising FUTURE — that's God's Word in Jeremiah of the Bible. A hope, that's today before you start talking about the future. So you don't marry a poor man by mistake you see it, and choose to stay because of he is handsome. 

My amazing mother, Didi-Omah Charity Chikodi, once said to us, "my children marry the person that loves you, then learn to love the person, if you want long life and enjoying marriage. Most people are not enjoying their relationship but enduring it, that's how their marriage will be". If I am not comfortable and enjoying my relationship with you, I break it off, you might be hurt it better than for you to be fooled to the future. Desolving it now saves time, energy and resources than later!

Stop the distractions and focus on the future. “I am building a company, what do you think, my woman” — her response will let you know the future. “My love, I just wrote JAMB, what is your suggestion about this process” — his response is what you seek. My mother became a senior patron in the top federal teaching hospital in the South-South part of Nigeria because of who she married. She met her husband, Engr. Omah John Didi, my father, when she was managing a small provision store in Elele, Rivers State — I think I get the actual place right. From regular customer to her provision store, became friends, she opened up to him about her nursing dreams.

He expressed his love for her, she accepted. And in the process of time, she would have dumped him because he is not a university graduate. No one will have known her story by now. She prays, and God keep him around her, she have to proceed with him. She moved from friendship to courtship, and she was in School of Nursing, Rumueme, when she gave birth to me. A woman with a nursing dreams got it at the expense of marrying right without looking the situation around. Her friends talked her down about the man she is marrying.

She graduated and was working in a private clinic in Rumueme, where they had all their children. My father had a better plan for her, he use his little connection joined with her relationship with God, her husband presented her to a wealthy chief in Rivers State, and she was not even interviewed. She was empowered by the federal government into the University of Port Harcourt Teaching Hospital, Rivers State. Now she is a landlady, earning millions. Her husband is in Abuja working for a construction company that partners with the Minister of Abuja, Barr. Nyesom Wike. 

That is why I can beat my chest and said, success does not requires four years degrees. I know billionaires that doesn't finished universities and some never crossed the gate of universities. School gives you degrees to show that you are certified for the field, and that doesn't mean you are educated. An educated person is he who uses what he has learnt to solve real world problems. An educated person is one that is updated with past and current affairs of the world. Your majestic command in life is your depth insights in your field. 

I will tell you the truth, since I graduated from Federal Polytechnic Ekowe, Bayelsa State, in 2024. I have been to places and none had asked about my certificate; because of what I am offering they are thinking I went to university, no I choose Polytechnic. I choose the lowest valued tertiary education in Nigeria to prove to people that you don't need certificate to be successful in life, you need knowledge and God to step in success in life.

My father secured a good contract and was moved to Abuja even when he did end his formal education after secondary school, because of the wife he married. Executive, stop that rubbish, end that distractions, sit up, build an alter and connect back to God. Whatever you are feeling, confused, depressed — come to Jesus Christ, get it right with God. Balance it with God. I am a product of love, so I know what is love because I and my siblings was raised in love by both my father and mother uprightly. Don't beg for love, you are more precious to be someone's second opinion. More Success To You!

© Didi-Omah Augustine Chinazaekpere 

(Founder, The Organisation DIDI-OMAH)