My Ex’s Friend Confessed He Was Supposed to Drug and Assault Me

I met Prince in my final year at university. We sat next to each other on a VIP bus from Accra to Kumasi. He was charming, confident, and seemed like someone who knew what he wanted. We exchanged numbers, and two weeks later, we started talking. I liked him. When he asked me to be his girlfriend, I said yes.

But it didn’t take long for the mask to slip. Prince was controlling. He checked my phone all the time. He always wanted to know where I was, who I was with, and whether they were male or female. I felt like I was being watched. I couldn’t breathe.

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One Thursday night, I was at his place when my boss called around 9:30 p.m. He apologised for calling late and asked me to prepare slides for a presentation the next day. He sent the document on WhatsApp and was explaining how he wanted it done. Prince walked in from the bathroom, grabbed my phone, and said, “Who are you, and why are you talking to my girlfriend at this time?” I kept telling him it was my boss, but he didn’t care. He ended the call and said my boss was being unprofessional. I tried to explain, but he wasn’t listening. So I got dressed and left.

On my way home, I called my boss back to apologise and finish the task. After giving me the instructions, he asked, “Are you sure about this guy?” But I had already made up my mind. I wasn’t going to stay in a relationship with someone who didn’t respect me. I’m not the type to say, “I love him, so I’ll stay.” I don’t tolerate emotional immaturity. And yes, Prince was verbally abusive too. He threw tantrums when things didn’t go his way. I wasn’t dating a man. I was babysitting one.

The next day, I called him and asked to meet. He thought I was coming to apologize. I was already at the restaurant when he arrived. We ate. I acted normal. After the meal, I told him I couldn’t continue the relationship. I said I didn’t like insecure, controlling men. He started shouting. “Instead of apologising for flirting with your boss, you’re breaking up with me?” I said, “You owe me and my boss an apology.” He didn’t take it well. He called me cheap and a whore and said all kinds of nasty things. I just laughed, paid the bill, and left him there talking to himself.

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Six months later, I met Kwaku. He kept asking me out, and I kept saying no. One day, he insisted we go on just one date, so I agreed. After the date, I started opening up a little. He invited me to his house, but I asked if we could sit in his summer hut instead. He brought drinks in wine glasses, and I told him straight that I wasn’t going to drink them. I had my own Don Simon in my bag, so I took it out and drank that.

We talked for a while. He asked about my past relationship, and I told him how it ended. He shared a bit about his own too. I left not long after, and soon I noticed he started acting distant. I didn’t like him that much anyway, so I stopped trying.

A month later, he messaged me on WhatsApp and said he had a confession. I asked, “Confession?” Then he dropped the bomb.

He said he was Prince’s friend. Prince had asked him to get close to me, gain my trust, and make sure I would not refuse an invite to his house. Then, as tradition would suggest, he was supposed to offer me a drink. But that drink was meant to be drugged.

The plan was to rape me and record it. My ex and a guy I met a few months ago turned out to be friends

He said Prince told him I owed him money and refused to pay, so he wanted to use the video to blackmail me. But the truth is, Prince just couldn’t handle the fact that I broke up with him. He was used to being the one who ended things. His ego was bruised because I was the first woman to walk away.

After the first attempt failed, Prince told him to try again. That was when Kwaku came to his senses. He told me everything and apologised.

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Then he said he wanted us to move past it and start a real relationship. With me. The same woman he had planned to drug and assault because his friend claimed I owed him money. I didn’t owe Prince anything. And even if I did, that was never the way to handle it.

I refused. Why would I ever be with someone who had the courage to plan something so cruel just because another man told him to?

I said no. Straight up. Why would I date someone who was willing to hurt me just because his friend told him to? That’s not love. That’s weakness. I accepted his apology, yes.

But let me be clear. If they had succeeded, I wouldn’t have stayed silent. I wouldn’t have disappeared or pretended it didn’t happen. I would have fought back with everything in me. I would have taken them to court, dragged their names through the mud, and made sure they never forgot the woman they tried to destroy.

Some men think they can control women. That they can punish us or shame us when things don’t go their way. But I’m not one of those women who folds.

—Ama

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