I Haven’t Seen My Baby Daddy In A Year Now

I moved in with my boyfriend, without the knowledge of my parents. The very first month I got there I got pregnant. At the beginning, he spoiled me financially.

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But after just a month, things started to change. He began drinking heavily and staying out late into the night. Sometimes he would leave the house around 1 p.m. and not return until 3 a.m. When I questioned him, he told me, “I’m a man, I can do whatever I want.”

Before I moved in, I had already opened my workplace and had people working under me. He took me out of  work when I started living with him. He said he was rich and could provide everything I needed. Since I was pregnant, I reluctantly accepted his decision.

As the months passed, his behaviour grew worse. He openly received calls from his girlfriends in front of me. My pregnancy was difficult. I was often sick, but he showed me no affection, no care. One day, out of curiosity, I checked his phone and saw chats with different women. To one of them, he wrote that I was the one who forced myself into his house, and that he wasn’t married.

Loneliness consumed me because I was new in that area and had no friends. Even when I cooked, he would sometimes return home late at night with his six male friends, and I would be forced to wake up, warm the food, and serve all of them before they went back to their apartments.

I complained many times, cried, and prayed for change, but nothing worked.

One rainy night, he went out and didn’t return home. At 1 a.m., I locked the door and went to bed. He later came back, but since I didn’t hear his knocks, he slept at a friend’s place. The next morning, instead of speaking to me, he entered the house, removed the TV, gas cylinder, and some of his clothes, and told me he was leaving.

“Since you want to control my life, why don’t you keep the house?”

He even gave me transport money in case I wanted to return to my parents. Pregnant and devastated, I went on my knees and begged him to stay.

After that, I stopped questioning his lifestyle. I focused on my pregnancy, the house chores, cooking, and washing his clothes while he went out to see other women. Unlike before, he no longer involved me in his outings.

When my pregnancy was six months along, he told me one night: “Since your pregnancy is getting bigger, I want you to go to your village and give birth there so your mother can take care of you properly.” I agreed, and for a short while, he became nice again. He even gave me money for personal upkeep, including my hair.

Months later, I went to the village to give birth. Before I had the baby, my neighbour called me, and said: “Your man has brought another woman into the house.” My heart shattered. When I confronted him, he replied coldly: “I will live my life the way I want. Nobody can change me, not even you. If you’re tired of me, move on.”

I confided in a woman who took me in like her own daughter. With her intervention, he later drove the girl away. When I gave birth, he paid the hospital bills, called often, and sent money for baby milk for four months. Then he stopped.

Before I left for the village, he had told me: “After three months, you’ll come back.” But now my baby is one year old, and I haven’t heard from him. He ignores my calls and has even blocked me. He’s always online, and sometimes he opens my messages but never replies.

Here is my dilemma, should I pack my bags, go to the city, and confront him? Or should I move on quietly with my life and stop bothering him?

She Would Introduce Me To Rich Men Who’ll Give Me Money

Since I moved in with him, he has never bought me shoes, clothes, earrings, or bags. The only thing he ever bought for me was slippers, even though he regularly shops for himself and wears quality clothes.

Because of this, a part of me wants to demand that he give me a huge sum of money to take care of our child, rent an apartment, and reopen my shop.

—Naya

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