He Carries Water on His Head for Me… Then Lies About Owning a Car

I’ve been dating this guy for the last five months. He’s been very kind and committed to our relationship, even more than I thought he would be. On Friday nights, he takes me out to meet friends and chill. On some Saturdays, he comes to my place and helps me do my chores. He even goes out to fetch water and carries it on his head for me. I love him so much for the little things, but for some reason, he thinks he has to do more to convince me to love him. So he brags about everything.

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He said he bought a car and that the car got stolen, so he’s been saving money to buy a better one. He mentions big cars and big brands, but looking at the kind of work he does, it’s obvious he can’t afford such cars, and the car he said was stolen is a lie he tells to make himself feel better about not owning a car.

We were watching a video and a popular restaurant came on the screen. He said, “Oh, these people, don’t mind them. They appear flashy, but their food is not nice.” He went on and on about how he has been eating there and how each day their food got worse. I intentionally asked which of their branches he visits, and he mentioned Spintex, meanwhile this restaurant doesn’t have any other branch in Accra.

There’s this popular Kumawood actress that I admire. My guy says when he was in Kumasi, he was friends with the actress’s brother and that the actress pushed herself on him, but he rejected her. I don’t know much about the actress, but it’s an obvious lie he told to make himself feel important. And I’ve noticed a trend: whenever he’s lying about something, he tries so hard, adding unnecessary details just to convince you that what he’s saying is true.

Sometimes I’m embarrassed. And it looks like his friends know this about him, so when he starts, they make a certain sound, like clearing their throats or something. We were talking about how the dollar rate keeps going down. We were with one of his friends. My boyfriend said, “The way I’m hot about this dollar depreciation. When the dollar was GHC14, I bought $15,000 and saved it, hoping it would go up, but now see.”

Thriving In A Relationship When The Man Doesn’t Have Money

To be honest, I helped his friend make that sound together. He can lie. He can brag for Ghana, but he’s a good person at heart. He understands what partnership in a relationship is. He extends a helping hand willingly. He’s always there—except he’s there to lie or brag. How do I tackle this in a way that’s not embarrassing or demeaning?

If he’s able to work that out, he’ll be the sweetest person I’ve ever known. Please help.

—Brenda

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