At 15, she was sentenced to prison indefinitely. At 28, she returned to a life of challenges. Yet “whatever I was going through, one day it is to glorify God”

While girls her age were busy with school, 15-year-old Lyana Gwee was already an unwed mother to a baby girl and serving a prison sentence with no definite end.

She was living in a rented terrace house that was being used for an opium business when CNB (Central Narcotics Bureau SG) officers stormed the place.

Lyana at 15 with her baby daughter and her niece and nephew.

When questioned, she said the drugs in the house were hers, not fully grasping the magnitude of the situation. She was later convicted for drug trafficking.

Because she was only 15, Lyana was sent to prison at The President’s Pleasure, a practice where underaged offenders convicted of capital offences are spared the death penalty but detained indefinitely.

Part 1 of her story followed her from her childhood, when she was exposed to drugs, to her conversion to Christianity in prison. This is Part 2.

God-given motivation 

Three years after she was in prison, kept in a single cell, and one year after she decided to receive Christian counselling for the chance to get out of the cell, Lyana had a personal encounter with God. While worshipping with the Pastor who counselled her, she was moved by a song about Jesus dying for man’s sin.

“It hit me very hard that Jesus died for my sins so that I can be redeemed. That particular day, I was crying very badly. That was when I encountered God.”

She had felt abandoned and unloved by her family. God’s redeeming love set her on the path for change. She decided to resume her education, having dropped out of school before she could take her PSLE.

The girl who had played truant since Primary 3 became a straight A student behind bars. She scored five straight As in her ‘O’ Level exams and was among the top 3% of the entire cohort that took the exam that year.

“It’s amazing the way God showed me my capability, that somebody who was so broken, from such a messy childhood and in prison could become the top student.

“I don’t ever think it was by my own effort because I don’t think I was academically smart. I was only street smart because I grew up on the streets. No one expected that I would score straight As. It was really a proud moment.”

But while she progressed in her studies, there was no news of her release. Year upon year passed and Lyana remained in prison.

God in the silence

In that season of quiet, God spoke.

“Two to three years after I first encountered God, I had a second encounter. God spoke to me: ‘I have a future for you but right here, right now, this is your training ground. It is to train you so I can equip you to be who I want you to be. This is your battleground.’

“It was a battle with myself, with the brokenness in my life where He would help me to become whole. God amazingly planned the phase for me.”

That was the time when it was “a lot of just me and Him”. She dug into the Word and clung to the truths in the sermons that she heard, and drew comfort from the counsellors who journeyed with her. Through all that, God gave her a hope that was far beyond her hopeless circumstances.

“He told me, ‘The world may seem silent to your situation. You may not seem to have hope, you may not be able to see the end of the tunnel, you may not see the light, but I am with you.’”

God in the waiting

So Lyana waited. There was nothing else she could do. Some days, she was encouraged by the promise that if she waited, she would “soar like an eagle” (Isaiah 40:31).

Some days, she ranted at God.

“’Where is the hope that You want to give me?’ I would argue with the Lord, ‘Why am I waiting? Why so long?’”

She saw people released only to re-offend and return to prison, and that made her all the more bitter.

“I told God, ‘You give them a chance to be released but they keep coming back. God, can You do something for me?’

“My conversations with God were raw. There was a lot of ‘God, why? God, when?’”

The prison doors never opened for Lyana in that time but many doors of opportunity did. While she was studying for ‘O’ Levels, she was asked to coach others who were preparing for the qualifying test for secondary school. It gave meaning to her time behind bars.

“They picked me because I was one of the top students in prison. So that was how God brought me comfort and encouragement through different people and different things so I can press on. It was God showing a lot of grace.

“I told Him, ‘I will hang on to You. You will not let me down.’”

More opportunities would surface. While doing her Diploma in Marketing, Lyana was selected to be trained in IT so she could train others in prison. In 2006, Lyana completed her diploma studies. By then, she had been in prison 11 years.

God in uncertainty

Around that time, a fellow inmate who had the same sentence as Lyana was released. The woman had been in prison for 13 years.

“That gave me some form of hope. That was when I started to see light at the end of the tunnel.”

Then Lyana was told that she might be shortlisted for a work release scheme. But she was not told when that would happen. When months passed and she saw no change, she complained to God.

“That was when God said: ‘Be patient’,” she recalled to Salt&Light.

In 2008, two years after she had earned a diploma, Lyanna received Presidential pardon and was released into The Turning Point, a halfway house for female ex-offenders. She had been in prison for 13 years and was 28 years old by then.

Lyana (right) at 28 with now retired founder of The Turning Point Florence Ng (right). It was at the halfway house that Lyana found her feet after being released from prison where she had been incarcerated since she was 15.

After six months at The Turning Point, she was given a position in an events company where she would remain for 11 years. Because she had grown up in prison, adapting to life outside was “very, very challenging”.

“The first day I came out I remember after my interview for the job, my case worker left me at Bugis MRT. After I bought my first handphone, I was super lost. How do I get back? How do I get around places?”

Lyana also had to reconnect with her daughter. By then, Tiffany was 14, the same age Lyana was when she had her.

“It was difficult. She was getting rebellious, she wouldn’t listen, but she was respectful.”

In the midst of this, God showed His hand of mercy again. Until then, Lyana had either lived with family, in a rental flat or in the office.

When she had enough means, she decided to buy her own flat. She could not purchase one as a single person, so she decided to co-own the flat with her father. He was suffering from dementia and very ill by then.

Two weeks after they bought the flat, he passed away.

“It is by God’s grace. If my dad passed on before I got the flat, I would not be able to get the flat.

“God timed it very well to make sure me and my daughter had a place to be comfortable and to build our lives.”

The God Who heals

On the outside, Lyana looked like she was on the mend: Her prison days were behind her, she had a job and a home, and her daughter was back in her care.

But on the inside, there was “still that brokenness” in her. She still harboured unforgiveness towards her mother whom she felt had not stood up for her when she was arrested.

The change of heart came not with conversion but over a long time.

Lyana (right) in her 30s with a friend.

“It was one or two years after I was released, when I was picking up my life that I slowly began to heal. It wasn’t like a dramatic moment. My journey with God has always been slow brewing.

“I came to understand that what my biological parents couldn’t do for me, God is able to give me.

“When I look back, it felt like God knew that if I continued to stay in the world with my biological family, I would not be where I am today. He had to remove me from that situation to mould me to be the person He wants me to be even though it was so difficult.”

The realisation that her life was more than the consequences of her poor decisions and challenging circumstances restored Lyana to wholeness, allowing her to slowly forgive her mother for not coming to her aid.

“No matter what, there is hope”

The assurance that “God is my only hope” laid the foundation for Lyana to face the challenges that were to come.

When Tiffany was 17, three years after Lyana’s release from prison, she was diagnosed with an auto-immune disorder that affected her eye and spread to her spine. For a whole year, she was in and out of the hospital for treatments and rehabilitation – before relapsing and going through the cycle again.

Lyana (right) and her daughter Tiffany. An auto-immune disorder would cost Tiffany her leg.

“We didn’t know if she would lose her eyesight. Half of her body became numb and she lost mobility. So we didn’t know if she would be able to walk again.”

An ITE student at the time, Tiffany had to stop school. By the time she was well enough, she had lost so much time that it was no longer possible to go back to school. Instead, she went to work part-time at an events company.

In time, Tiffany was offered a full-time position and there were plans for her to learn how to be a barista and move into the F&B industry. But she faced another setback in her health.

In 2019, what started as a fever became an infection that landed Tiffany in the hospital for three years and ended with two amputations.

At first, they removed her leg from just above the knee. When the infection did not abate, they removed her entire thigh right up to her pelvic bone.

Lyana told Salt&Light: “I never questioned God through this. It never crossed my mind to doubt. I only knew that my God would come through no matter what. If He brought me through 14 years in prison and instability at home, whatever happens, God is in control.”

Tiffany is now well enough to work in the same recruitment agency as Lyana. As God had promised, the training ground that was prison did indeed fortify her for battles in life.

“I am not an unloved child,” Lyana declared. “God is the Father I didn’t have. I am not abandoned. I am loved and protected by God. So I know that no matter what happens, there is hope.”

Of her willingness to share her story with Salt&Light, and at churches and halfway houses, Lyana had this to say: “Back in prison, I did imagine that whatever I was going through, one day it is to glorify God.”

Click here to read Part 1 of Lyana’s story.

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