my employee doesn’t have what it takes to do the job he wants

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager.

A reader writes:

I’m in a tricky spot with a long-time employee, “Bob,” and I need advice on how to deliver a potentially devastating piece of feedback: “You just don’t have what it takes to succeed in this role.”

Bob is interested in growing from his current position into a more senior role. He has studied the field for about two years, including taking a few training courses paid for by the company. He’s been provided with mentors through a network of industry contacts.

As part of his learning process, we have given Bob oversight of several small projects. He works hard, but there are a few problems we keep coming back to, including a lack of communication skills – he frequently mishears or misunderstands initial requirements, which means that he spreads misinformation and leaves the rest of the team playing catch-up – and difficulty understanding how to prioritize.

Bob also struggles to receive feedback, even mild course corrections. Each coaching session, no matter how focused on concrete requests, leads him to a spiral of anxiety and irritability, which ends up impacting the team. Bob has damaged relationships to the point that a few coworkers refuse to work with him.

Bottom-line: as eager as Bob is to learn this role and develop his skills, he’s bad at this stuff. He lacks many of the innate skills that the requires, hasn’t shown any improvement, and I spend many hours per week clarifying his messages and dealing with conflicts he’s created. That, plus the inability to respond professionally to feedback, makes me think that he’s fundamentally unsuited for this role. We can’t spend more resources trying to train him.

How do I tell Bob that this is not a role he can excel at, at least in our company? How do I say, kindly but truthfully, “I’ve stuck my neck out for you as far as I’m willing and unfortunately, you just don’t measure up. Find another goal”?

I answer this question over at Inc. today, where I’m revisiting letters that have been buried in the archives here from years ago (and sometimes updating/expanding my answers to them). You can read it here.