Dear Selassie, I Never Told You This but You Need to Know Now

I met you back in SHS 2, somewhere in 2015, during an interschool competition at Persco.  You were in SHS 1 then; you were radiant and so full of laughter and effortlessly beautiful. From that moment, something in me changed, in a good way. You had this calm energy, this glow that made everything around you seem softer, brighter. I didn’t know it then, but meeting you would become one of the most unforgettable moments of my life.

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We started as friends, innocent, curious, and genuine. We wrote letters filled with young dreams, secrets, and emotions too deep for our age. Each letter felt like a heartbeat on paper. You quickly became my everything, Selassie. My first real love. The one who made me understand what it means to truly care for someone beyond words.

Back then, love was pure. It wasn’t about what we had, but what we felt. I was always looking for new ways to show you how much you meant to me. Every vacation was a reason to smile, every call was something I waited for all week, and every time I saw you, the world felt right again amidst all the evil. I remember sneaking out of school just to visit you. I’d walk for miles with a small gift in hand, all just to see that smile of yours that could melt every worry away. Back then, it never felt wrong.

There was one day I’ll never forget; I was sacked for trying to see you. I had brought an envelope full of cash as a surprise gift. I handed it to a lady passing by, asking her to deliver it to you, but I never knew if she did. I never even asked her name. That was how far my heart could go for you, not out of obsession, but out of pure, selfless love.

You told me once you weren’t ready for a committed relationship, and I understood. I never forced it. I simply held on quietly because you were worth waiting for. Your intelligence, your sense of humour, your strength – everything about you inspired me. I even considered becoming a Sabbath observer because I wanted to walk your path, to become the kind of man who could fit into your world. That’s how deep my love for you ran.

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After school, we kept in touch for a while. Life began pulling us in different directions, and though time passed, something in me refused to move on completely. My heart stayed where it met yours. I still miss you, Selassie. I really do. You were the best part of my story, the chapter I never wanted to end.

Do you remember the novels we shared? The random calls that came out of nowhere, yet always came right when I needed to hear your voice? The laughter that lingered long after we said goodbye? I remember it all. The memories never faded; they only grew softer, like an old song I never stopped humming. Your name is still my password, a secret I carry quietly. I still keep the hymn book you gave me — a piece of you I’ve never been able to let go of.

I often find myself wondering how you are. How life has been treating you. Are you happy? Are you where you hoped to be? Have you found someone who cherishes you the way you deserve? I ask myself these questions not out of jealousy, but out of genuine care. If you ever needed anything, anything at all, I’d still be there without a second thought.

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To be honest, love hasn’t been gentle with me. I’ve met people who saw my kindness as weakness, who came only to take without giving, who made me doubt the worth of my own heart. But through it all, my mind always drifts back to you, to the girl who made me believe that love could be innocent, patient, and real.

If you’ve moved on, I’ll understand. Life goes on, and people change. But I’ll always be thankful that I met you. You were the light that taught me how to love without fear, without expectation. And if fate ever lets our paths cross again, I promise I won’t hesitate this time. I’ll look into your eyes and tell you what I’ve carried all these years: that I never stopped loving you.

Forever yours..

—Junior

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