San Francisco Blackout: Waymo Robotaxis Play Freeze Tag While Tesla FSD Just Keeps Rolling

December 20, 2025: San Francisco loses power to 30% of the city. Traffic lights go dark. Chaos ensues.

Waymo robotaxis: “No signal detected… initiating eternal hazard-light disco mode.” Hundreds of them freeze mid-intersection like deer in headlights (except the headlights are just blinking sadly). Drivers behind them: honking symphony intensifies.

Tesla FSD cars: “Traffic light? Never heard of her.” They calmly treat dark intersections like 4-way stops, roll through smoothly using vision-only AI, and keep cruising like nothing happened.

Elon Musk, popping up on X five minutes later: “Tesla robotaxis completely unaffected. Thanks, billions of miles of training data including blackouts. Waymo who?”

Tesla AI account dropping the mic: “We trained on real-world apocalypse scenarios. Your move.”

Residents stuck in the jam: “Great, the future of transportation… and half of it just blue-screened because the stoplight took a nap.”

Moral of the story: When the grid goes down, one robotaxi fleet turns into expensive orange-blinking roadblocks… The other just shrugs and keeps driving.

Vision-only gang: 1 Lidar-and-traffic-light-dependent gang: 0

Who’s ready for the inevitable “But Tesla ran a stop sign!” counter-thread?

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