People who become unbearable to be around as they age usually adopt these 7 behaviors (without realizing it)

As people age, their behaviors and attitudes often evolve—but not always for the better.

Some individuals unknowingly adopt habits that make them increasingly difficult to be around, straining their relationships and isolating them from others.

According to psychology, these tendencies often stem from unresolved emotions or shifting perspectives over time.

In this article, we’ll explore seven behaviors that can make someone unbearable to be around as they age—and how to avoid falling into these patterns:

1) Constantly comparing the past and the present

It’s a common trait in people who become less bearable as they age—the constant comparison of the past with the present.

In their eyes, things were always better “back in the day”.

The music was better, the movies were better, the food was better—you name it.

This behavior tends to create a negative atmosphere around these individuals; it’s like they’re stuck in a time warp and won’t let anyone else forget it.

This doesn’t mean we should ignore or dismiss the past.

After all, our experiences shape who we are, but there’s a fine line between appreciating the past and constantly criticizing the present.

The key is to find a balance, to appreciate what was while also embracing what is.

It’s okay to reminisce about good times gone by, but not at the expense of appreciating the present and looking forward to the future.

2) Becoming overly critical

We all know that one person who seems to have a comment about everything.

I remember my old neighbor, Mr. Smith; he was a sweet man, but as he aged, he developed a habit of critiquing everything and everyone around him.

From the color I painted my house, to the way the gardener trimmed the hedges—nothing escaped his critical eye.

Initially, it was easy to brush off his comments as harmless observations but, over time, his constant negativity became draining.

It seemed that Mr. Smith had forgotten how to see the good in things.

His focus was always on what was wrong, what needed fixing, or how things could be better.

The reality is, nobody likes to be around constant criticism; it creates an uncomfortable environment and can quickly turn a pleasant gathering into an awkward one.

3) Resisting change

As humans, we are inherently wired to seek comfort and familiarity.

This tendency can become more pronounced as we age, leading some to resist change staunchly.

Researchers found that older adults were more likely to prefer routine and resist changes in their daily activities compared to younger adults.

This resistance to change can make individuals seem rigid and set in their ways.

They may refuse to try new foods, resist technological advancements, or even object to changes in their neighborhood or social circles.

While it’s natural to feel attached to certain routines or ways of doing things, it’s equally important to stay open-minded.

Embracing change can lead to new experiences, personal growth, and can make one more adaptable and interesting to be around.

4) Dominating conversations

Everyone enjoys a good chat, but not when it feels like a one-sided monologue.

Dominating conversations is a behavior some people adopt as they age, often without realizing it.

While it’s natural to want to share one’s experiences, consistently dominating conversations can make others feel unheard or unimportant.

The key is balance; conversations should be a give-and-take exchange where everyone feels heard and valued.

It’s about respecting others’ voices as much as sharing one’s own.

5) Becoming set in your ways

I’ve always been a creature of habit: I enjoy my morning coffee just so, I have a particular way of organizing my books, and I like to wind down each day with a good read.

But over the years, I’ve noticed an inclination to become more rigid in these habits.

The problem starts when these habits turn into rules—unbreakable ones at that.

Like that time when I refused to try an e-book because it wasn’t a “real book,” or when I was adamant about not using a new coffee maker because it didn’t make coffee “my way”.

What I didn’t realize at the time was how this rigidity was limiting me and it was preventing me from exploring new experiences and making me less adaptable to change.

Over time, I learned that it’s okay to have routines and preferences, but it’s also important to remain flexible.

After all, growth and learning often happen outside our comfort zones.

6) Developing an unhealthy obsession with health

Staying healthy is important at all stages of life, but as we age, it’s natural to become more conscious of our health.

However, some people develop an unhealthy obsession that can be off-putting to those around them.

I’m talking about those who constantly talk about their aches and pains, monitor every morsel they eat, or are incessantly worried about falling ill.

While it’s important to take care of one’s health, obsessing over it can make interactions monotonous and tiring for others.

By all means, take care of your health, keep up with your doctor’s appointments and maintain a healthy lifestyle—but there’s more to life than just health concerns.

Engage in diverse conversations, explore new hobbies, and stay interested in the world!

7) Forgetting the importance of empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others—it’s what allows us to connect with people on a deeper level.

As we age, it’s crucial not to lose sight of this important trait.

People who become unbearable often forget to empathize with those around them.

They might disregard others’ feelings, become dismissive, or fail to acknowledge others’ perspectives.

Remember, everyone is going through their own journey with its unique challenges and triumphs.

By practicing empathy, we can maintain strong relationships and foster a positive environment around us.

It keeps us grounded, considerate, and enjoyable to be around, no matter our age.

Final thoughts: It’s a matter of awareness

The complexities of human behavior, especially as we age, are often tied to our self-awareness or lack thereof.

When it comes to aging gracefully and maintaining healthy relationships, this emotional intelligence plays a crucial role.

It helps us identify and prevent behaviors that may make us unbearable to others.

Recognizing our tendencies to compare, be overly critical, resist change, dominate conversations, become inflexible, obsess over health, or lack empathy is the first step.

The next is actively working to change these behaviors.

As we age and navigate life’s ups and downs, let’s strive to maintain our emotional intelligence.

Let’s ensure that we remain mindful of our actions and their impact on others.

Because, at the end of the day, it’s about growing old with grace, kindness, and compassion!

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