My Parents Wants Me To Marry A Stranger For Marrying Sake

In December, my parents introduced me to a man they think is good for me. I’m thirty-three and don’t even have a boyfriend, but I’m not desperate. It’s my parents who are desperate for me to get married, and somehow I understand them. I didn’t argue with them when they asked me to come and meet a man.

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I met him, and he was a nice gentleman. He came from abroad for the December holidays and wanted to use the opportunity to meet a woman he could marry. After the introduction, we started talking. He always wanted me to come to his house and visit him, though I hadn’t accepted his proposal. I told him, “I want to build things slowly.” He doesn’t understand why I want to build slowly when my parents had told me everything.

I didn’t like his rush, but there’s more I didn’t like about him—his level of education. He didn’t even complete SHS when he got the connection to travel abroad. I asked about the job he does abroad, and he couldn’t mention anything specific. He said, “I have a house and my own cars. That should tell you I’m doing well abroad.”

Those things are not my fancy. I have a car too, but I don’t have a house. I’m well educated. Next year, I will be going back to school to do my PhD. I want a man up there who will complement or shadow my dreams, not just a man who thinks houses and cars are everything.

We are not dating, but before he left the country, we fought four times. When he was going, he didn’t even tell me. He got there and sent me a photo telling me he had reached the airport. Today, he’s telling me if I understand him, he’ll take me abroad and make my life better with children. He’s in Romania. I have traveled to the US, Canada, and Australia, and I’m going to the UK in a month’s time. His “abroad” doesn’t make any difference.

I want to like him. I want to have a reason to study him, but this man is so hollow he won’t give me a stepping chance. But my parents are on me every day, asking me to give him a chance. It worries me that my parents are worried about me. It hurts me for them to think that I’m the one making it harder for the man abroad. They tell me, “You’re a woman. If you keep picking and choosing, you may go empty-handed,” but that also doesn’t mean I should settle for less.

I Left Him Because He Didn’t Help In The Kitchen

The way things are going, we are not getting anywhere. But I’m talking to him just to please my parents. It’s hard to love your parents to the extent of wanting to do everything for them, but this one, I can’t. I wish they would understand me, but how…?