My Boyfriend Is Leaving Me Because I Cut My Hair

On my twenty-eighth birthday, I decided to look different, and the only thing that came to my head was to get a haircut. I posted photos of different haircuts on my status and asked which one would fit my face and appearance. My boyfriend saw them and said nothing. When I was with him, I gave him the impression that I wanted to cut my hair, and he even joked that my face would look horrible.

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The night before my birthday, I went to the salon and got my hair cut. I looked in the mirror and felt a version of me that traveled long ago had come back home. I was looking prettier than I had even thought.

I slept, woke up in the morning to a call from him that he was coming over. I knew what he was coming with, so I prepared for him. Immediately he saw my face, he screamed, “What have you done to yourself?”

I burst out laughing, asking him if I looked more beautiful than he expected to see. I even gave him a 360 so he could see me in all my glory and shine. He stood quietly, shook his head, and started leaving with all the things he came with.

“Arnold, what is wrong? Are you serious about leaving? What’s the problem?”

I wore my slippers and followed him, but by the time I got to the gate, he had driven away. He didn’t pick up my calls until later he sent a text, “What do you take me for if you won’t talk to me about a decision as important as cutting your hair? Am I even your boyfriend? Did you think about how I would feel before you did it? It only means I don’t matter in your life.”

I apologized. I said I was trying to surprise him. I even said it was part of my birthday package for him. What haven’t I said or done? He still insists I didn’t respect his opinion, and because of that, he hasn’t spoken to me since my birthday on the 9th of August. He blocks me and later unblocks me. I thought he was punishing me for a while and would later forgive me, but for this long?

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Is he right the way he’s treating me? It’s my own hair, ooo. Yeah, it would have been nice if I told him, but what’s love without surprises? Should I stop chasing and wait until he comes back? What if he doesn’t?

—Ellen

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