“Lord, I cannot make it on my own”: While caring for her cancer-stricken parents, she was diagnosed with breast cancer

A few years ago, both my parents were diagnosed with cancer.

My mother, a breast cancer survivor, was diagnosed with Stage 1 endometrial cancer in 2018. She was 60. She fought bravely, holding tightly to her faith.

In 2022, my father was diagnosed with Stage 4B oesophageal cancer at the age of 68. Watching my mum suffer affected him deeply. She was his world. Her pain became his, even as he began his own battle.

At the time of his diagnosis, Dad had retired from work for more than 10 years. Before that he owned a small business, while Mum was a homemaker who helped my grandmother collect recyclables to support the family. She was always home to cook for us, while Dad took care of household chores. Together, they shared a quiet rhythm of life built on love, hard work and simple joy.

When Dad was diagnosed, I was doing well in my career, secure and comfortable. I tried to balance work and spending time with my parents. Because of her healthcare background, my younger sister Michelle naturally became the hands-on caregiver.

But as their health declined, I knew my priorities had to shift. It was Michelle who helped me realise that I might need to make a decision. When Mum’s condition worsened and Dad also began to need more attention, she made the brave choice to resign and care for them full time. Watching her do that gave me the conviction to do the same. 

Alicia before her parents took ill within years of each other.

Alicia (right) with her sister Michelle: They tag-teamed to look after their parents.

At the end of 2022, I applied for no-pay leave to spend time with my parents. We spent our days simply, sharing hawker food, enjoying ice kacang, sitting quietly in their room. Sometimes I would watch them nap and thank God for another day together. Those ordinary moments became my treasures.

I prayed for healing at the beginning, but over time, my prayer changed. I began asking God to give me courage to accept when their time was near, and strength to prepare my heart to say goodbye.

After her mother passes away, she receives shocking news

Then came the hardest chapter. After three years of battling cancer, my mum passed away on December 12, 2023. Just one month later, my dad left too.

In the middle of those two losses, between their deaths, I was diagnosed with Stage 2B breast cancer. 

It felt like everything had collapsed. I was grieving, barely breathing, and now I was facing my own fight for survival.

During my dad’s funeral, I had to leave to meet my surgeon and confirm my surgery details. It was too much. I asked God why everything had to happen at once.

I underwent a mastectomy on February 2, 2024. The tumour measured four centimetres wide and was classified as the most aggressive type of cancer. Of the 18 lymph nodes they removed, two contained cancer cells. The cancer I had was ER-positive and HER2-negative.

Following surgery, I went through 16 sessions of chemotherapy, followed by 15 sessions of radiotherapy. I also started on hormone and targeted therapy, which will continue for the next fie years.

During this time I was often lost for words when I prayed. One night, as I sat crying in my room, I felt the Holy Spirit prompting me to look out the window. When I did, I saw a large heart-shaped cloud drifting across the sky. It stayed for only a few seconds before fading away, but in that moment, I knew God was speaking to me. He was saying, “I am here with you.”

A heart-shaped cloud from the Lord reminded Alicia that He was with her.

There were many nights I cried out in fear, fear of death, of pain, of the unknown. Yet even in those moments, God’s presence surrounded me. His Word became my anchor.

Isaiah 41:10 reminded me: “Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.”

I began to see that His promises weren’t just words, they were alive. Every answered prayer, every comfort, every small mercy was His way of saying, “I’m still here.”

I learned that His love isn’t earned, it’s given. What He desires is our presence, our time, our trust. Through His Word and the Holy Spirit, He filled my heart with peace, joy, and love. My role was simply to hold on.

Witnessing God’s mercy and kindness 

Even in loss, God’s mercy shone through. When I missed my parents deeply, I would tell God how hard it was. I would ask Him to hold my hand and give me strength, just like how my mother always did. She used to pray, read her Daily Bread devotion, and say: “I leave it to Jesus. It is going to be okay.”

When she was diagnosed with cancer, that same faith carried her. Even in pain, she remained cheerful. She ate well, laughed easily, and often joked and played with my dad. She showed me that joy could exist even in suffering, and that faith could bring light into the darkest moments.

Watching her live out her faith taught me what trust in God truly looks like. It is not just about believing in miracles, but resting in His presence, knowing He is good, no matter the outcome.

“My mother’s quiet confidence in God inspired me deeply. Sometimes it is in the quiet surrender and cheerful heart that we see the greatest strength,” the author said of her mother (pictured).

Inspired by my Mum, I shared the Gospel with my Dad. One day, during a quiet conversation, I asked if he wanted to receive Christ. He said yes. It was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. After that, he prayed, sang worship songs, and even led our family in prayer. God’s grace transformed him.

A week before my mother passed away, she suffered a stroke and went into a coma. I was caring for my Dad and couldn’t visit often. But one evening, I was given the chance to see her. She smiled, held my cheek, and we talked. When I left, she waved goodbye. That was the last time I saw her awake  – and I was the last person she knew she saw before the stroke. That moment became a sacred memory, a quiet gift from God. It reminded me of His kindness, His perfect timing, and how even in the hardest moments, He allows love to linger.

There were moments when I felt overwhelmed, especially at the start when everything happened at once. In those moments, I would pray and say: “This is too hard, Lord. I cannot make it on my own. If You have allowed this, please help me.” Then I would worship, pray and thank Him for the small blessings He gave me each day.

My treatment journey was tough: Surgery, chemotherapy, radiation, and now hormonal therapy. Going to hospital often triggered memories of my dad’s suffering. But God surrounded me with love.

My sister Michelle was grieving the loss of our parents too, yet she stepped in to care for me without hesitation when cancer struck. Even though she was willing, I often felt like a burden. I knew she was hurting, and I wished I could spare her from more pain. But through it all, she became one of the greatest blessings in my life. She stood by me, cared for me with tenderness, and continues to do so even today. Her love reminded me of God’s grace, quiet, steadfast, and unwavering.

The Cancer Ministry from my church, Grace Assembly of God reached out. Friends checked in weekly. Two anchors in my life – my Aunt Helen who is my spiritual mentor and my best friend Phoebe – brought encouragement and comfort. Financially, He provided even though I did not work.

During chemotherapy, I couldn’t run like I used to, but I began to step out for brisk walks every day. It started small, just a short distance, but slowly, each walk grew a little longer. With every step, I felt like I was regaining control over my life. It wasn’t about speed or distance, it was about movement, about choosing to keep going. Those walks became a quiet act of faith, a way of saying: “I’m still here, and God is walking with me.”

“I was never angry with God. I looked at Him as my Father and I know that a Father will never harm His child,” said the author, seen here during a chemo session.

On nights when I couldn’t pray, I hummed worship songs softly in bed. Even when words failed, His presence filled the room. Slowly, I began to notice small blessings again, a good meal, a kind message, strength for a short walk. Each little thing whispered: “I am with you.”

James 1:2-4 says: “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.”

I’ve learned that peace isn’t the absence of pain, it’s the presence of Jesus in the storm.

Jesus said we would face trials, but He has overcome the world. That is my hope. Because He suffered and died for us, I know I’ll see my parents again in heaven.

Now that I’m better, I’ve stepped into a new season. I left my full-time job and am studying counselling. My heart is to walk alongside those who are hurting, to listen, to comfort, and when the time is right, to plant a seed for the Gospel.

When I think of Jesus as the Prince of Peace, I think of how I no longer worry about what’s to come. I know I have a place in heaven. As Romans 8:28 says: “God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love Him.”

Today, Alicia has left her full time job and is studying counselling. “My heart is to walk alongside those who are hurting, to listen, to comfort and when the time is right, to plant a seed for the Gospel.”

And as 2 Timothy 4:6–8 teaches, until the day we meet Jesus, we are called to remain faithful. I may not understand everything now, but I trust His plan. Jesus accepted me as I am. He held my hand through the hardest race of my life.

This is the peace Jesus gives, I don’t have to fear what comes next. This peace doesn’t come from ease, it comes from knowing Who holds my life. And that is Jesus.

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