'Have Bath, Finish Office Tasks': Bengaluru Man's Checklist Before Suicide

The 34-year-old techie who died by suicide at his home in Bengaluru had been planning his death for months and had prepared a detailed checklist of everything he needed to do in the days leading up to it, ticking off every task once it was done.

'Have Bath, Finish Office Tasks': Bengaluru Man's Checklist Before Suicide


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The 34-year-old techie who died by suicide at his home in Bengaluru had been planning his death for months and had prepared a detailed checklist of everything he needed to do in the days leading up to it, ticking off every task once it was done. A printout of the checklist was pasted on the wall of his Bengaluru home, right next to another print that said 'Justice is due'. 

Atul Subhash, who hanged himself on Monday, left behind a 24-page suicide note and recorded a nearly 90-minute long video in which he alleges that his wife and her relatives had filed a slew of false cases against him and his family and were trying to get him to pay Rs 2 lakh a month as maintenance for her and the couple's four-year-old son. Subhash, who is originally from Bihar, also made allegations against a judge in Uttar Pradesh's Jaunpur, where his in-laws live and some of his cases were being heard, claiming that she had demanded Rs 5 lakh from him to settle them. He also wrote a letter to the President, criticising the criminal justice system and highlighting a rising trend of false cases being filed against men by their estranged wives. 

The checklist prepared by Subhash was divided into three parts - 'Before last day', 'Last day' and 'Execute last moment' - and included items like removing his phone fingerprint and face recognition, presumably so that it could be accessed by others after he was dead; leaving his car, bike and room keys on the fridge; and completing all his office work and submitting his office laptop and charger.

While the list has a column for ticking off the tasks in the 'Last day' and 'Execute last moment' sections, it has 'Done' printed against the items in the 'Before last day' section, indicating that these had already been completed before the list was printed out. These included securing his finances, finishing office tasks and legal preparations, compiling all communications, and backing up data and "creating redundancies".

In the 'Last day' section, the techie, who works in Artificial Intelligence according to his suicide note, had another task related to creating a local data backup as a redundancy. The other items included removing the fingerprint from his phone, uploading his scanned suicide note, clearing all payments, uploading his video suicide note and submitting his laptop, charger and ID card at his office. 

The top of the list on his 'Execute Last Moment' section was having a bath, followed by keeping his car, bike and room keys on the fridge and the suicide note on the table. The focus on the car keys was also evident from the police complaint filed by Subhash's brother, Bikas Kumar, who said the techie had sent him several messages saying goodbye and sharing the Google Maps location of his car. The other items on the list included sending messages to his lawyers and family and sending mails to the High Court and Supreme Court - after checking attachments - in which he had complained about the judge assigned to his case, who allegedly took bribes. 

'Took Months'

The fact that this list was carefully planned was also reflected in Subhash's suicide note, in which he mentions that it took him months to ensure that all his "pending responsibilities" were completed. 

"It took me a few months to make sure that I complete my pending responsibilities I had towards my family and finish my work commitments etc. Also a lot of government office work is slow, that also led to this delay in suicide. I hope this delay will not go against me and will not help harassers and extorters of me and my family," the techie wrote.  

"The more | work hard and become better at my work, the more l and my family will be harassed and extorted and the whole legal system will encourage and help my harassers... Now, with me gone, there won't be any money and there won't be any reason to harass my old parents and my brother. I may have destroyed my body but it has saved everything I believe in," he said in another part of the note. 

Instigation?

In his suicide note, Subhash said his wife and her family's cases against him included one under the Dowry Prohibition Act and others pertaining to sections like cruelty against a woman. He said when he had pointed out to the judge at one point that men are dying by suicide because of false cases, his wife had asked him why he wasn't doing so. He claimed the judge had also laughed at this while ordering his wife to leave the room and then his mother-in-law had asked why he had not died by suicide yet. 

Subhash said when he had asked his mother-in-law how she and her daughter would get money when he was gone, she said she would get it from his parents and ensure that his family kept doing the rounds of courts for life. 

"It seems that Devi Saraswati herself made my mother in law disclose her plans and the solution of all the problems too. This incident along with instigation to commit suicide from my wife and the face of the laughing judge mocking my helplessness has rendered my faith in legal system destroyed and has prompted my action of committing suicide (sic)," he wrote.

Helplines
Vandrevala Foundation for Mental Health9999666555 or help@vandrevalafoundation.com
TISS iCall022-25521111 (Monday-Saturday: 8 am to 10 pm)
(If you need support or know someone who does, please reach out to your nearest mental health specialist.)

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