COLUMN: Parenting in Troubled Times: Raising Responsible Children in a Confused World

By Fatimah Bintu Dikko

In every generation, parents have faced challenges in raising their children, but the times we live in today seem particularly complex. The world has grown smaller through technology, yet the hearts of many have drifted farther apart. Values that once held families together are now constantly questioned, and the moral compass that guided communities seems to spin in confusion. For many parents, the struggle is not just about providing for their children but about helping them find their way in a world that appears to have lost its own sense of direction.

In times past, the home was a sacred place where children were nurtured not only in body but also in spirit and character. It was in the home that one learned respect, humility, and honesty. Parents worked hand in hand with schools, religious bodies, and communities to ensure a child’s upbringing reflected shared moral standards. Today, however, that harmony appears broken. The digital age has opened the doors of every home to influences parents cannot always control. Television, internet content, and social media now play an active role in shaping young minds, sometimes more powerfully than the voices of parents themselves.

What makes parenting especially challenging today is that we are contending with a culture that often rewards the very things that destroy true growth—greed, pride, and materialism. Young people are taught, sometimes indirectly, that success is measured by possessions rather than purpose, and appearance rather than authenticity. When these values are absorbed early, they create a generation that is restless, entitled, and emotionally fragile. The result is not just seen in schools or on the streets, but in the gradual erosion of family peace.

Yet, it is important to remember that every generation has its share of storms. What truly defines good parenting is not the absence of challenges, but the courage to confront them with wisdom, love, and consistency. Children, regardless of how distracted or exposed they may be, still respond to genuine affection and clear guidance. The power of presence—simply being there—cannot be overstated. Many parents today are physically available but emotionally absent, consumed by work or the constant chase for survival. But children grow best not on things, but on love and attention.

The problem is also communal. In the past, every child was considered the responsibility of the entire neighborhood. A teacher, a neighbor, or an elder could correct a misbehaving child without fear of backlash. Today, that social fabric has weakened. Parents defend wrongdoing rather than address it. Communities turn away from troubling behaviors until they become crises. The child who once needed a word of direction becomes the adult society later condemns. If we truly desire a better society, we must begin by rebuilding the partnership between home, school, and community.

Another pressing issue in modern parenting is the conflict between traditional discipline and modern freedom. Many parents are torn between wanting to maintain firm control and wanting to be “friends” with their children. But love without structure leads to confusion, just as discipline without warmth leads to rebellion. Children need boundaries, but they also need to know that those boundaries come from care, not control. It is possible to be both firm and kind, to discipline without destroying, and to guide without suffocating.

Religious and moral education must also return to the center of upbringing. For too long, many families have delegated this responsibility to schools or places of worship, forgetting that moral lessons begin with example, not instruction. A child who sees honesty in action will live it; a child who grows in an atmosphere of love will naturally show compassion. Parents must therefore embody the virtues they want their children to learn—patience, kindness, truth, and responsibility. Teaching by example remains the most powerful form of influence.

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