23 Secrets to Tell a Guy You Like Him Over Text, BIG Mistakes & Must-Knows

Admitting you like someone takes a lot of guts and vulnerability. But it can be easier, you just have to learn how to tell a guy you like him over text.

If you’re sitting there, phone in hand, wondering how to tell a guy you like him over text, you’re not alone.

From love letters sealed with wax to short, snappy texts accompanied by heart emojis, the ways we communicate our feelings have certainly evolved over the years.

Nowadays, digital communication dominates our world, making texting an essential mode of conveying our emotions, especially in the realms of romance.

Figuring out what the right thing to say is can be hard when your heart is skipping beats and your stomach is tied up in knots. Luckily for you, we’ve got all the tips and tricks you need!

[Read: 48 rules and texting etiquette for guys and girls in the early stages of dating]

Understanding the Psychology of Text-based Communication

Navigating the world of texting, especially when it comes to telling a guy you like him over text, can sometimes feel like walking through a maze blindfolded.

There’s the torturous wait for a reply where minutes morph into what feels like eons. Then there’s the dreaded task of deciphering the tone of a message, sans the warmth of a voice or the clarity of facial expressions.

And don’t even get us started on the anxiety that those tiny ellipsis dots can trigger!

But knowing a little bit about the psychology behind texting can help you rationalize your thoughts and calm down those jitters. [Read: How guys text when they like you and 28 signs to decode his behavior]

1. The texting time paradox

Have you ever clock-watched after sending that all-important text? One minute goes by, then five, and before you know it, it’s been an hour, and every notification sound sends your heart into a flutter. It feels like time is playing tricks on you.

Scientifically, this is akin to temporal distortion where our perception of time gets skewed based on our emotional state. When we’re anxious or eagerly awaiting something *like a text reply*, time can feel agonizingly slow. Recognizing this can help us manage our expectations and anxieties.

The key? Distract yourself. Engage in other activities and resist the urge to check your phone continuously. [Read: Being left on read – What it really means when someone doesn’t respond to you]

2. Perceived tone

In face-to-face communication, a vast amount of information is conveyed through non-verbal cues. But when it comes to texts, we’re flying blind, leading to potential misinterpretations. The fundamental attribution error plays a role here.

This psychological concept suggests that we tend to attribute a person’s behavior more to their character and less to their situation.

In texting terms? If he sends a curt “Okay,” we might think he’s mad when he’s just busy.

To counteract this, it’s essential to give the benefit of the doubt. If a message seems off or unclear, seek clarification rather than making assumptions. And, when expressing yourself, consider how your words may come across without vocal or facial cues to back them up. [Read: 37 reasons, signs and must-knows when a guy stops texting you often]

3. Ellipsis anxiety

Three simple dots, yet they’re a source of so much speculation! Are they typing? Did they change their mind?

The ellipsis creates a suspenseful void, and human nature abhors a vacuum. After all, we’re wired to seek completion and clarity. This is linked to the Zeigarnik effect, where people remember uncompleted tasks better than completed ones.

Those ellipses signify something unfinished, and our brains naturally zoom in, making us anxious.

The best way to deal with this? Recognize that everyone has their own texting style and pace. Those three dots might be his way of pausing to think, not necessarily an indication of doubt or reluctance. [Read: Should I text him first or wait for him to text me? Yes, no and what to know!]

Setting the Stage

Before you hit send on that heartfelt message about how you feel, it’s essential to set the scene for your digital confession.

Like placing the chess pieces just right or finding that perfect lighting for your selfie, understanding the groundwork before telling a guy you like him over text can truly make a difference.

Here’s how to do just that:

1. Emotional attunement

Think of texting as a duet, for it to sound harmonious, both parties need to be in tune. It’s essential to gauge where he’s emotionally at the moment. Did he have a rough day at work? Or did he share something exciting with you?

Matching your message’s tone to his current mood can significantly increase the positive reception of your heartfelt words. Remember, it’s not just what you say but how and when you say it that counts. [Read: Emotional connection – 38 signs, secrets, and ways to build a real bond]

2. Finding the right time

It might be tempting to spill the beans at 2 AM when the feelings hit, but consider his daily routine and circadian rhythms. Is he a morning person, bright-eyed with a coffee cup in hand? Or does he flourish during the nighttime?

Choosing a time when he’s most alert and receptive can be a game-changer in how your text is perceived. Think of it like catching a radio frequency at its clearest signal.

3. The memory recency effect

Let’s say you both had an incredible time at that recent concert or shared a laugh over an inside joke. Bringing up these recent shared memories can serve as a comforting and relatable prelude to your confession.

It’s a psychological nugget that capitalizes on the recency effect—people tend to remember and feel more affectionate about the latest events. So, before you tell a guy you like him over text, anchor your feelings to a shared, happy moment. [Read: 24 secrets and tips to ask a guy out over text casually and hang out together in no time]

Crafting The Perfect Message

You’re sat there, phone in hand, heart pounding, and you’re ready to tell that guy how you feel. But how do you distill all those swirling emotions into a text?

Let’s talk about how to craft that message and tell a guy you like him over text, striking just the right balance between candidness and consideration.

1. KISS *Keep It Simple, Sweetheart*

It’s easy to get carried away when feelings are bubbling over, but simplicity can be your best ally. Aim for clarity and directness.

While it’s tempting to draft a poetic soliloquy, remember that being genuine trumps all. A simple, “Hey, I’ve started to develop feelings for you,” can be just as powerful as a Shakespearean sonnet.

2. Emoji empathy

Emojis are the seasoning to the digital dish that is your message. They can help convey emotions that words might not fully capture.

Want to keep it light and flirty? Throw in a Read Original